My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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