good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
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