very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Randomize