Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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