I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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