Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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