I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
Randomize
