Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
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