What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize