im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
Randomize
