we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
