I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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