Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
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