Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
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