We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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