So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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