Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
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