Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
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