Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize
