is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
