my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
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