***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
Well, I'm off to go seduce a gay man. In 10 years when I'm 300 pounds, sitting in a mumu surrounded by my 500 cats, remind me of this text. That way I can be like "ohhh THERE'S where I went wrong!!"
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
