The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
