this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
I think pants incapable of making pants work
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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