No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Brb crying the tears of my youth
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
Randomize
