I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
There are leaves in my underwear?
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