OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
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