She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
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