we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
Randomize