so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
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