Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
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