i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
Randomize
