Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
