we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
