I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Randomize
