after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
Another day, another engagement, another cat
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize
