i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
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