new low.... made out with someone while peeing
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Randomize
