Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
Randomize
