I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
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