Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
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