When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
