I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize
