i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
Just pee around me
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
did i just pee glitter
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
