We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
Randomize
