I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
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