Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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