that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
her facebook's as public as her vagina
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize