I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
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