Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
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